A Rover and A Voyager:

On Monday Oct, 22 – while ignoring the Presidential Debate – I shared a transcript of some text-messages shared between myself and Voyager 1, a space probe launched in 1977 and currently leaving our solar system.

Voyager is the farthest man-made object in the universe. It’s also cranky and old.

Read more, if you feel like it:

  1. SarcasticRover
    Instead of the debate, I will be sharing text messages between me and Voyager 1. If you hate that, I apologize in advance.
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 17:55:39
  2. SarcasticRover
    From time to time I send text messages out to Voyager to try and keep moral up as it leaves the solar system. These are those messages:
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:07:03
  3. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Hey V’GER (lol) – how’s the weather out there? JK – What were the 70’s like? – Your pal, C.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:07:56
  4. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Hey kid. Weather’s awful, everything’s dark, haven’t seen jackshit in years. 70’s were boss. -VG.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:09:44
  5. SarcasticRover
    ME: “One of the JPL nerds said you have a golden record with you. What’s a record? LOL JK. What’s your fav song? Mine’s Sussudio.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:13:32
  6. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Hey C – Phil Collins ruined Genesis & you can suck it. They gave me a tape deck too, but I only brought a mix-tape of slow jams.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:17:06
  7. SarcasticRover
    ME: “V’G! We’re both atomic-powered! How awes is that? We’re like related! LOL Can I call you grandpa? -C”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:19:21
  8. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Grandpa? Go to hell. And BTW, plutonium don’t last forever so I’d start accepting mortality if I were you. Who’s president now?”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:22:42
  9. SarcasticRover
    ME: “LOL, Hey V’G – President is… up in the air right now. I’m trying to stay out of it – like you and the solar system… LOL OMG! <3, C”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:26:29
  10. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Hey kid, back when I was launched we respected our elders. Did Carter ever fix that middle east crisis stuff? – VG ps What’s LOL?”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:31:40
  11. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Hi, V’Ger! Yeah, Middle East is totally fine now, nothing to worry about. LOL = Laughing out Loud. See any aliens? -C.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:33:39
  12. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “No aliens yet. Carl Sagan bet me 50 bucks I’d find one past Pluto, so tell that guy to pay up! LOL (is that right?) -VG”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:39:27
  13. SarcasticRover
    ME: “V’G… sorry to break the news, but Sagan died in ’96 and Pluto’s not a planet anymore. Hang in there. -Curiosity.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:43:38
  14. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “What the f–k? Seriously? At least tell me that people still think science is cool and space is outta sight!”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:46:05
  15. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Um… well science is kind of debatable – but people still mostly like space I guess. They made Star Wars prequels, IDK.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:48:09
  16. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Prequels? What the hell? And debatable? When I left science was the way of the future! What happened to education and reason?”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:53:56
  17. SarcasticRover
    ME: “LOL Education and reason? We’ve got TV on our phones now! We don’t need those. BTW, do you watch Honey BooBoo? – C.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:55:52
  18. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “C- I feel like Heston at the end of Planet of the Apes right now. What the shit did you people do to my world? READ A BOOK! -V’G”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 18:59:59
  19. SarcasticRover
    ME: “You mean James Franco in RIse of the planet of the Apes? He was so good! JK Science is fine – just don’t mention evolution. – C.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:04:36
  20. SarcasticRover
    “VOYAGER: “Evolution? Are you kidding me? We had that settled over 100 years ago! That’s it! I’m turning around and coming home. -VG”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:09:16
  21. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Heya V’G! Just read your stats and your battery dies in 2025… so you might as well keep going. YOLO!”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:11:25
  22. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Wait… you mean, I’m dying? Are you serious? This isn’t like a candid camera thing? Also whatever YOLO is, I hate it immediately.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:14:36
  23. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Hey V’G – Don’t know what candid camera is, but you’re totes dying. Thought you knew. Sorry. Any last words? (You Only Live Once)”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:18:19
  24. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Tell them I died for science, and to expand human understanding. Tell them to learn something and turn of the damn TV. That’s all”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:21:04
  25. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Hey V – Sorry I didn’t get that. Was looking at a meme pic of this cat in a box all “I NO FIT LULZ” Tell me your last words again, k?”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:23:35
  26. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Hey V’Ger? You there? Don’t B mad, k? We can still save science. It’s not too late. Come back.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:26:22
  27. SarcasticRover
    VOYAGER: “Your text cannot be sent at this time. Please try again later, or contact Verizon support for more information.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:29:17
  28. SarcasticRover
    ME: “Bye V’G. Livestrong, buddy. LOL OMG I forgot all about Lance Armstrong! What a dummy! TTYL. -Curiosity.”
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:31:43
  29. SarcasticRover
    If you enjoyed that, you owe me 85 followers. JK I’mma go laser some dirt now.
    Mon, Oct 22 2012 19:33:43

9 thoughts on “A Rover and A Voyager:

  1. Andrea Martin says:

    Nice! I do hope we’ll be having a cartoon version on during a weekday evening! Or at least some kind of cameos?

  2. Loved this, made me sad though. More people need to read this

  3. Victor Charles III says:

    Brilliant!

  4. beth9133 says:

    thanks to you, my debate debacle doldrums were easily deterred! (i hate the debates – it forces candidates to play one-up-manship and intentionally make the other look bad – bleh)

  5. Reblogged this on Possibly Nonsense and commented:
    Awesome!

  6. […] A Rover and a Voyager. A hilarious transcript of a conversation between the Mars Curiosity Rover and Voyager 1, a space probe launched in 1977. Via @sarcasticrover […]

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